1 00:00:04,680 --> 00:00:05,680 Honky is your chicken. 2 00:00:05,920 --> 00:00:10,760 Honky is your goose. So come on, all you coarse ass, and shake your caboose. 3 00:00:11,080 --> 00:00:12,480 Shake your caboose. 4 00:00:13,280 --> 00:00:14,280 What did you think? 5 00:00:14,360 --> 00:00:15,800 Where did you get that cheer from? 6 00:00:16,020 --> 00:00:17,300 The Underground Railroad? 7 00:00:18,700 --> 00:00:21,000 If you don't watch it, you're going to need Harriet Tubman. 8 00:00:21,920 --> 00:00:23,100 How was your evening breakfast? 9 00:00:23,500 --> 00:00:25,680 Awful. Heather had to drop off the squad. 10 00:00:26,120 --> 00:00:29,140 Oh, good. That girl was so dizzy, she forget how to spell SMC. 11 00:00:30,300 --> 00:00:31,660 No, Mama, that was me. 12 00:00:34,120 --> 00:00:35,200 Well, it can be confusing. 13 00:00:35,820 --> 00:00:36,880 So, uh, what happened? 14 00:00:37,120 --> 00:00:38,160 She got pregnant. 15 00:00:38,460 --> 00:00:42,360 If we don't find somebody to take her place on the team, we can forget about 16 00:00:42,360 --> 00:00:45,280 competing in the regionals. Oh, well, you still got time to find a 17 00:00:45,640 --> 00:00:46,640 I guess. 18 00:00:46,880 --> 00:00:51,140 But what kind of dummy gets pregnant so young and then drops out of school? 19 00:00:53,820 --> 00:00:59,140 The kind of dummy that gives up her hopes, her dreams, her figure, and 20 00:00:59,140 --> 00:01:01,420 from 72 hours of labor for you. 21 00:01:02,330 --> 00:01:05,090 Yeah, that's right, Mama. Do that cheer again. It was so cute. 22 00:01:05,610 --> 00:01:07,250 How lucky is your chicken? 23 00:01:09,130 --> 00:01:10,130 Girl. 24 00:01:58,700 --> 00:02:03,460 my keyboard and voila my system was up and running oh it was nothing oh and uh 25 00:02:03,460 --> 00:02:10,340 thanks for fixing my computer too not now t can't you see 26 00:02:10,340 --> 00:02:14,420 i'm busy yeah we're supposed to talk about my research paper uh well i'll 27 00:02:14,420 --> 00:02:20,140 reschedule when can you say f all right i'll tell you tomorrow like you're gonna 28 00:02:20,140 --> 00:02:26,520 get some of that students can't live with them can't get paid without them 29 00:02:28,300 --> 00:02:31,620 Back to us. Now, how can I thank you for all your hard work? 30 00:02:31,880 --> 00:02:33,720 Professor, all I did was turn on your monitor. 31 00:02:33,960 --> 00:02:37,160 Oh, you turned on much, much, much more than that. 32 00:02:38,100 --> 00:02:40,540 Are you flirting with me? Well, um, yes. 33 00:02:41,320 --> 00:02:42,320 Is it working? 34 00:02:42,400 --> 00:02:44,120 I'm flattered, but I have a boyfriend. 35 00:02:44,820 --> 00:02:46,100 Well, we don't have to tell him. 36 00:02:47,340 --> 00:02:48,820 You are so funny. 37 00:02:49,620 --> 00:02:51,120 Funny, but out of luck, huh? 38 00:02:51,840 --> 00:02:54,680 Actually, you're not. I think I have somebody who's perfect for you. 39 00:02:55,600 --> 00:02:56,760 Well, does she look like you? 40 00:02:57,210 --> 00:02:58,570 As a matter of fact, she does. 41 00:02:58,970 --> 00:03:00,150 Well, I'm free Saturday. 42 00:03:03,190 --> 00:03:04,190 Hey, it's me. 43 00:03:04,550 --> 00:03:05,590 What are you doing Saturday? 44 00:03:06,150 --> 00:03:09,290 Good. I have somebody you have to meet. You're going to love my mom. 45 00:03:10,590 --> 00:03:11,930 He's a professor at SMC. 46 00:03:12,610 --> 00:03:14,070 No, he's not old, old. 47 00:03:15,070 --> 00:03:16,210 He's middle -aged like you. 48 00:03:17,650 --> 00:03:19,050 Vanessa, I forgot. 49 00:03:19,910 --> 00:03:22,110 Saturday is my holy day. Gotta go. Bye. 50 00:03:59,520 --> 00:04:00,980 Somebody had to root for the Pilgrims. 51 00:04:03,720 --> 00:04:05,000 Don't do this to me. 52 00:04:06,180 --> 00:04:09,140 Well, see, baby, this is not about you. It's about me. 53 00:04:09,480 --> 00:04:12,880 I had to quit the squad when I was pregnant with you, so this is kind of 54 00:04:12,880 --> 00:04:14,800 second chance, and I don't want to let it go. 55 00:04:18,399 --> 00:04:21,180 Well, we've all enjoyed a little stroll down memory lane. 56 00:04:22,160 --> 00:04:23,620 But we're preparing for the regionals. 57 00:04:24,060 --> 00:04:26,860 That's right, and you've got to be able to do more than clap your hands and 58 00:04:26,860 --> 00:04:27,860 stomp your... 59 00:05:09,710 --> 00:05:12,890 running shoes good because you're gonna need them i gotta get fabric for my new 60 00:05:12,890 --> 00:05:17,910 cheerleading outfit new sneakers and a new pair of pom -poms now i have a rule 61 00:05:17,910 --> 00:05:24,770 nothing kinky till the second date like you have second dates i'm trying out for 62 00:05:24,770 --> 00:05:28,490 the smc cheerleading squad now why do you want to be a cheerleader at your age 63 00:05:47,210 --> 00:05:48,210 Too happy. 64 00:05:48,930 --> 00:05:49,930 Professor! 65 00:05:50,190 --> 00:05:51,950 You look so... Young. 66 00:05:54,210 --> 00:05:55,210 Young? 67 00:05:55,470 --> 00:05:56,470 Try ill. 68 00:05:58,390 --> 00:05:59,890 Are you having a heart attack? 69 00:06:00,830 --> 00:06:05,350 Me? Who just climbed the Santa Monica stairs a hundred times, followed by 90 70 00:06:05,350 --> 00:06:10,070 minutes of weight training and a 10K run home. 71 00:06:11,270 --> 00:06:12,910 I got the heart of a 20 -year -old. 72 00:06:17,390 --> 00:06:19,830 to buy some of that Lady Egyptian wrinkle cream that you sell. 73 00:06:21,110 --> 00:06:22,350 Yeah, yeah, from my mother. 74 00:06:23,490 --> 00:06:25,610 Yo, Mama, you can use some yourself. 75 00:06:27,470 --> 00:06:28,470 Hush, Andal. 76 00:06:28,830 --> 00:06:30,630 More wrinkles mean more experience. 77 00:06:30,870 --> 00:06:33,170 And I'm like a man who knows how to get the job done. 78 00:06:34,310 --> 00:06:39,630 Now, Professor, this miracle cream smooths away wrinkles, shines your 79 00:06:39,630 --> 00:06:41,150 can be used as a dessert topping. 80 00:06:44,070 --> 00:06:46,030 You're kidding, right? All right, you got me. 81 00:06:46,300 --> 00:06:47,560 It's not so good on wrinkles. 82 00:06:53,840 --> 00:06:57,020 I don't know what gets into some people. They just can't act their age. Oh, 83 00:06:57,040 --> 00:06:59,120 well, can we talk about this while we shop for my pom -poms? 84 00:07:01,000 --> 00:07:02,360 Hey, baby. Hey, Mama. 85 00:07:02,880 --> 00:07:06,600 What's up with Professor Ogilvie? I just asked him how he was doing, and he said 86 00:07:06,600 --> 00:07:07,800 he was too legit to quit. 87 00:07:09,600 --> 00:07:10,640 What does that mean? 88 00:07:12,280 --> 00:07:14,780 Oh, now he's quoting M .C. Hammer? 89 00:07:15,070 --> 00:07:16,470 I hope he don't start wearing them genie pants. 90 00:07:17,390 --> 00:07:20,370 Look, Puttin', me and that dog gonna go down to the swap meet so we can shop for 91 00:07:20,370 --> 00:07:21,370 my cheerleading outfit. 92 00:07:21,610 --> 00:07:24,850 Mama, why do your dreams always turn into my nightmares? 93 00:07:25,230 --> 00:07:26,730 Just means I'm doing my job, baby. 94 00:07:27,470 --> 00:07:29,550 Come on, girl. 95 00:07:31,310 --> 00:07:32,350 Bye, Poop. Bye. 96 00:07:39,230 --> 00:07:42,070 You want to be in a movie? I can make you a star. 97 00:07:46,890 --> 00:07:49,690 I've got to get an A on my broadcast journalism class. Not with that big old 98 00:07:49,690 --> 00:07:50,690 shiny forehead of yours. 99 00:07:53,610 --> 00:07:55,170 That was some footage worth shooting. 100 00:07:58,270 --> 00:08:00,190 Yo, yo, yo, yo. What's the dealio? 101 00:08:03,050 --> 00:08:04,050 Yo. 102 00:08:04,330 --> 00:08:05,590 Professor, is that you? Yeah. 103 00:08:06,110 --> 00:08:07,110 What do you think? 104 00:08:07,150 --> 00:08:08,290 I think I better go. 105 00:08:10,010 --> 00:08:13,570 All right, all right. But, Paige, brother, you know, hit me on my hip. 106 00:08:22,410 --> 00:08:24,870 Which one? Will Smith? Denzel? No, Cisco. 107 00:08:27,010 --> 00:08:29,910 You look good enough to be on BET's Walk of Fame. 108 00:08:31,170 --> 00:08:33,490 Why are you wearing the cheerleading uniform? 109 00:08:33,990 --> 00:08:35,350 Because I'm trying out for the squad. 110 00:08:35,789 --> 00:08:40,549 Uncle B, Uncle B, he's my man. If I can't have him, no one can. 111 00:08:42,970 --> 00:08:44,390 Well, I have a little cheer for you. 112 00:08:44,810 --> 00:08:47,290 When I say X, you say it. 113 00:08:47,570 --> 00:08:49,650 X, X, X, X. 114 00:08:50,170 --> 00:08:51,830 X? Don't mind if I do. 115 00:08:55,400 --> 00:08:56,420 Nikki, let's do this story. 116 00:08:57,940 --> 00:09:01,940 Nikki, you've just finished your audition. Can you tell everyone how you 117 00:09:01,940 --> 00:09:02,539 it went? 118 00:09:02,540 --> 00:09:07,620 I pushed him back, pushed him back, way back, way back. Yay, Nikki! 119 00:09:08,120 --> 00:09:11,180 Stevie, could you turn off the camera? Me and Mama, we need to talk. 120 00:09:12,180 --> 00:09:13,680 Oh, what's wrong, baby? 121 00:09:14,640 --> 00:09:16,460 Mama, you didn't make the team. 122 00:09:17,740 --> 00:09:19,760 Regina and Asia picked somebody else. 123 00:09:20,180 --> 00:09:22,500 What? But I was the best thing out there. 124 00:09:22,740 --> 00:09:23,800 Right, you were the best. 125 00:09:24,240 --> 00:09:25,740 But it's not about what you did. 126 00:09:26,180 --> 00:09:27,560 It's about the way you look. 127 00:09:28,640 --> 00:09:32,140 Uh -uh. Then this ain't right. And they are not going to get away with it. 128 00:09:32,180 --> 00:09:34,160 That's right. I'm not going to let them do this to us. 129 00:09:35,080 --> 00:09:37,020 Us? I quit the team. 130 00:09:37,680 --> 00:09:38,900 Mama, they cheated you. 131 00:09:39,480 --> 00:09:41,920 Man, forget those go team go hoochies. 132 00:09:43,580 --> 00:09:45,740 Oh, thanks, baby. 133 00:09:47,040 --> 00:09:50,000 Now all we need to do is find a team of our own. Yeah. 134 00:09:51,260 --> 00:09:52,260 You know what? 135 00:09:52,400 --> 00:09:54,800 Maybe we can get in touch with the other girls they rejected. 136 00:09:55,320 --> 00:09:56,580 That's a great idea. 137 00:09:56,940 --> 00:09:57,940 Bring it on! 138 00:09:58,200 --> 00:09:59,200 Hey! 139 00:10:06,800 --> 00:10:07,280 This 140 00:10:07,280 --> 00:10:17,600 is 141 00:10:17,600 --> 00:10:19,320 Stevie Van Lowe with a special report. 142 00:10:19,720 --> 00:10:21,360 Cheerleader Wars, day one. 143 00:10:21,880 --> 00:10:25,000 I'm here with Nikki and Kim Parker, who have just convinced the dean to allow 144 00:10:25,000 --> 00:10:27,640 them to create an alternate cheerleading squad. 145 00:10:27,940 --> 00:10:32,540 That's right. And we're challenging the SMC cheerleaders to a cheer -off next 146 00:10:32,540 --> 00:10:36,440 week to see who should represent SMC in the regional competition. 147 00:10:37,040 --> 00:10:42,020 What prompted you ladies to take such a drastic step? Gee, I'm over here. 148 00:10:44,540 --> 00:10:46,240 Yeah, but the honey's over there. 149 00:10:52,360 --> 00:10:56,040 not good enough, then maybe it's time we had a cheerleading team that's about 150 00:10:56,040 --> 00:10:57,040 school spirit. 151 00:10:57,300 --> 00:11:00,600 Yeah, it's not about who's most likely to be in a trick daddy video. 152 00:11:01,220 --> 00:11:06,100 So this is a crusade to elevate cheerleading in SMC from a tawdry 153 00:11:06,100 --> 00:11:07,160 bare female flesh. 154 00:11:07,980 --> 00:11:08,980 Yeah, whatever. 155 00:11:10,820 --> 00:11:14,520 Plus, I want to kick their little Barbie doll butt. 156 00:11:15,920 --> 00:11:18,760 Excuse us, we have to do some recruiting right now. 157 00:11:21,450 --> 00:11:22,450 And that's a wrap. 158 00:11:23,930 --> 00:11:24,990 Not for me. 159 00:11:25,370 --> 00:11:27,070 You all want to be in my movie? 160 00:11:32,510 --> 00:11:39,490 Ladies, welcome to the first practice of SMC's alternative cheerleading 161 00:11:39,490 --> 00:11:42,090 team. Is this going to take long? 162 00:11:44,090 --> 00:11:46,130 Like you've got some place to go. 163 00:11:58,280 --> 00:12:01,720 That cheerleading is not about what you look like on the outside, but what 164 00:12:01,720 --> 00:12:02,840 you've got in your heart. 165 00:12:03,100 --> 00:12:06,240 I got a place for those bimbos that rejected me. 166 00:12:07,020 --> 00:12:08,500 Right under my wheels. 167 00:12:10,160 --> 00:12:13,900 I don't want to be a cheerleader, but maybe I should just stick to 168 00:12:14,380 --> 00:12:18,320 Yeah. I got this really big project I'm working on, and I haven't quite figured 169 00:12:18,320 --> 00:12:21,640 out what I'm going to do, so... I'm going to go. 170 00:12:24,240 --> 00:12:25,540 Not so fast, Einstein. 171 00:12:26,730 --> 00:12:29,070 can't back out now. We got something to prove. 172 00:12:30,110 --> 00:12:31,110 Lacey's right. 173 00:12:31,170 --> 00:12:33,130 Now, you can't give up before you even start. 174 00:12:33,470 --> 00:12:34,750 Yeah, don't be such a loser. 175 00:12:36,330 --> 00:12:38,870 Shut your trap, you Busta Rhymes reject. 176 00:12:41,190 --> 00:12:44,610 What did you just call me, you fugitive from a demolition derby? All right, 177 00:12:44,630 --> 00:12:47,670 that's it. I'm about to burn rubber on your butt. Oh, come on. 178 00:13:01,130 --> 00:13:02,130 I'm going to keep it simple. 179 00:13:06,130 --> 00:13:07,730 Elevator, elevator, give him the show. 180 00:14:30,000 --> 00:14:31,000 Keeping it real. 181 00:14:31,880 --> 00:14:33,520 Not with them fake platinum chains. 182 00:14:36,220 --> 00:14:37,720 Professor Ogilvy, is that you? 183 00:14:38,320 --> 00:14:39,880 Vanessa, what's up, baby? 184 00:14:40,220 --> 00:14:42,040 You look so... Young? 185 00:14:42,800 --> 00:14:44,000 No, that's not it. 186 00:14:45,760 --> 00:14:50,360 Maybe it's your hat or those clothes or those chains you're wearing. Yeah, fly, 187 00:14:50,580 --> 00:14:51,519 huh? 188 00:14:51,520 --> 00:14:56,500 You see, you only see me at school, but, you know, off the clock, this is how I 189 00:14:56,500 --> 00:14:57,500 roll. 190 00:15:02,280 --> 00:15:04,500 little sisters on the cheerleading squad. No diggity? 191 00:15:06,660 --> 00:15:11,020 Vanessa, there you are. I've been looking for you. Oh, and I've been 192 00:15:11,020 --> 00:15:12,020 you. 193 00:15:12,320 --> 00:15:14,140 Heaven must be missing an angel. 194 00:15:14,440 --> 00:15:18,540 Excuse me, do I know you? This is the professor that I told you about, 195 00:15:18,540 --> 00:15:20,440 Ogilvie. This is Lorraine Jackson, my mother. 196 00:15:22,080 --> 00:15:23,080 Your mother? 197 00:15:24,720 --> 00:15:26,340 Your middle -aged mother? 198 00:15:28,280 --> 00:15:29,280 You're a professor. 199 00:15:29,600 --> 00:15:30,600 Yeah. 200 00:15:30,920 --> 00:15:34,060 I don't always dress like this. Yeah, just when he's off the clock. 201 00:15:35,520 --> 00:15:40,020 Look, I'm sorry we didn't have a chance to hook up. I mean, I'm sorry I didn't 202 00:15:40,020 --> 00:15:42,540 get together with you Saturday, but I'm free tonight. 203 00:15:42,900 --> 00:15:44,700 In fact, I'm free right now. 204 00:15:45,860 --> 00:15:50,300 I'm really flattered, but you're a little too young for me. 205 00:15:51,620 --> 00:15:52,620 I think it's starting. 206 00:16:04,910 --> 00:16:05,970 something on cheerleading, huh? 207 00:16:06,310 --> 00:16:09,710 Yeah. Okay, T, let's get ready. You know I used to be a cheerleader, right? 208 00:16:10,250 --> 00:16:11,490 And, uh, you're in my shot. 209 00:16:11,890 --> 00:16:12,890 Oh, really? 210 00:16:13,270 --> 00:16:16,670 Um, and don't you, uh, please step aside. I'm kind of trying to do a story 211 00:16:17,570 --> 00:16:21,610 Fine, be that way then. I was just trying to give your audience a little 212 00:16:21,610 --> 00:16:22,610 kick. 213 00:16:25,390 --> 00:16:27,430 And now the judges are taking their seats. 214 00:16:28,350 --> 00:16:33,970 The competition is about to begin. First up, the mighty SMC Corsair! 215 00:19:16,400 --> 00:19:18,960 look like she stepped off the cover of a fashion magazine. 216 00:19:19,220 --> 00:19:20,300 Am I right, Mama? 217 00:19:20,920 --> 00:19:22,780 No. Get oxygen. 218 00:19:26,500 --> 00:19:27,500 Girl, 219 00:19:27,780 --> 00:19:29,140 I told you it was too old for this. 220 00:19:31,320 --> 00:19:35,700 Nikki, I'm sorry. We should have never excluded you from the team. 221 00:19:35,920 --> 00:19:37,080 Yeah, you guys were great. 222 00:19:37,480 --> 00:19:38,940 Any chance we could all work together? 223 00:21:10,830 --> 00:21:11,830 you think it went.